After separating the two deacons who had come to fisticuffs in the lobby, I asked what in the world they were fighting about. They were both on different sides of the Great Living Stones Debate of 2012…fake-gold-plated offerings trays OR…chicken buckets. After five deacon meetings, three elder meetings, two congregational meetings, and a phone call to our church’s attorney about proper procedures from our by-laws…we’ve finally settled the Great LSC Debate of 2012 [all of the above is fictitious...like we have an attorney..pfft!...although what is sad is I can totally see this happening in a lot of churches I know]. What is true is that we switched offering trays.
Good-bye fake-gold-plated trays. HELLO Martin’s Supermarket Chicken Buckets!!
Why Martin’s Supermarket Chicken Buckets? Because Martin’s has the best fried chicken.
I would not call us a “redneck church.” But we are a “Fried Chicken Church” and those fake-gold-plated trays are about the most highfalutin thing we have and it didn’t match. So, we’ve pulled out the chicken buckets. And I’m going to bet if you did some analysis you’d find that our tithes and offerings have actually INCREASED since we made this move. And do you know why? Who doesn’t have an impulse to give more to God when the receptacle used to collect such an offering is a fried chicken bucket? I rest my case.
I am now going to write a book for mega-churches on how they can make more money…based on my chicken bucket